I hit a milestone!!

I have not posted to much lately because life is just downright busy! I finally just downloaded the Blogger app for my phone so when I get a spare moment I can write a little bit.

When I first started to write my blog, I honestly didn't think anybody would read it. Because let's face it! Who wants to read about a fat girl trying to get skinny. But then I started writing so I can look back and remember where I started.

On May 3rd, I wrote my first blog entry. I was determined then to lose weight but like most people in life, I gave up. I stopped trying to watch my calorie intake, I made excuses for myself, I stopped believing I could do it, I GAVE UP. On May 3rd, I wrote my starting weight of 201. As I type this, my current weight is 186!!! I finally stuck with something and it works! I have lost 15 pounds in 5 months. 5 of those pounds were on my own, but the other 10 are because I made a promise to myself to do weight watchers for 3 months. Not to give up and to stick with it. Well, I have only been on Weight Watchers for a month and a half and I am already seeing results!! There is no way I am giving up when my 3 months are up. I am in this thing for the long run. I most likely will not meet my goal by thanksgiving like I originality planned but that's okay. The important thing is that I reach my goal. And I will! No doubt about it!! :-)

I cannot wait to see where the rest of this journey takes me!!

One day at a time...

WW - Week 3

So I wanted to do a quick update about my journey with Weight Watchers. I kept meaning to update last week but to be honest with you, I was disappointed in myself. I jumped on the scale last Monday hoping to have dropped a pound and nothing! I was happy that I didn’t gain weight but I was really bummed out that I hadn’t lost any.

Every year, on thanksgiving, we always take family pictures and lots of "sister" pictures. Also, since the kids have been born, we also take professional Christmas pictures. I had set in my mind that this year, I would take my family pictures and I would see a difference. So when I got on the scale last week and it said no change, I thought, oh great, I’m still going to be the fat one in the pictures... Well, after I got off the scale, I was really low and feeling stupid and disappointed in myself until I reminded myself that I lost 3 pounds last week, and those were pounds off my body to make me healthier. So I changed my mind set, started a new week with WW and work hard to stick to my commitment.

Like every time I write a blog, I mention my lack of self control when it comes to food. This week I had a hard time with eating healthy. I ordered lunch for me and the kids on Thursday and instead of ordering a salad or something healthy, I ordered chicken fingers and fries. So for dinner, I ate light. This whole journey is about a life change. Not just a diet that will come and go but I am learning how to do things the healthy way so I can do this for the rest of my life.

My mom and I were talking this morning and when I told her I had lost 5 pounds, you would have thought I told her I won the lottery. She was so happy and excited for me and it made me proud! Anyway! We were talking about WW and the cost of being in the program and I told her I was committed to myself to pay for a year of this program and then I would reevaluate my situation. Money is hard to come by. Yes I am a stay at home Aunt. But I also own my own jewelry business so any money I make; I want to put back into my business. But I have come to learn, that I am worth $18.75 a month!! I am worth it! My hope is that in a year’s time, I will be at my goal weight and I will not be as dependent on WW Mobile. I am hoping to learn how to maintain. Not saying I won’t join up again at some point in my life I want to learn and train myself to eat a healthy diet for a lifetime.

I have lost 5 pounds in 3 weeks and to me, that is such an accomplishment! I am proud of myself. This week, for the first time in a long time, my family told me that they can see a difference in my face. Goodbye double chin!!!! :-) I am 5 pounds away from my first goal and I cannot wait to do it!! I might even splurge a little bit and have an apple with peanut butter that day! ha-ha!! This morning, I logged onto me WW Online to put in my current weight and a couple other things and I got a pop up on my screen telling me I had lost my first 5 pounds. There is a major sense of accomplishment when you read those words!

One day at a time...

 

 

 

Starting Weight: 201 pounds

Short Term Goal: 186 pounds (5% of my weight)

Long Term Goal: 150 pounds

Pounds Lost (total): 5!!! WoHoo!!!

Current Weight: 191 Pounds

WW - Week 1

Okay so last Monday I made the decision to start Weight Watchers. When I went into, I had hopes of losing weight but I seem to let go of just about everything on church night, or date night or any other night I deem as a special reason why I cannot "diet" for that day. But as church night, date night and every other night came by, I stuck to it! I continued to count points, continued to drink my water and continued to stay positive about my goals. Well I am happy to say that I have been successful this week and the scale showed that my hard work paid off. I jumped on the scale this morning and did a little happy dance because I lost 3 pounds in a week. That's huge for me! I have also decided that with every pound I drop, I am going to be proud of it. Most of the time with I try and diet, i'll get discouraged when I don’t lose 5 pounds or something crazy but this time, I’m looking at it different! Every pound lost is a pound closer to my goal!

I'll give a quick rundown on last week. Wednesday was church so as always, we went to McDonalds for dinner but instead of my normal meal with french fries and a large sweet tea, I had chicken selects {6 points} and a bottle of water. I felt proud of myself. After church, my Dad wanted to go out to Rita's Water Ice for a little treat. Normally I would go for the Vanilla Galati with lemon water Ice (YUM) but I got a child’s size Lemon {7 points} and was very satisfied and felt no guilt. I stayed within my allowed points and had a sweet treat. I would consider that a success.

Thursday was a little easier. I did run by my favorite Starbucks and order myself a Chai Tea {7 points} because I was dealing with a wicked caffeine headache that just wouldn’t go away. For dinner, we had Subway and I order the 6 inch wheat with turkey and ham, lettuce, American cheese, pickles and light mayo {10 points} Unfortunately they gave me regular Italian bread so that added extra points. Bummer.

Friday, Saturday and Sunday are where I struggled with my points but I never went over my weekly allowance so I think that was good. I have always said I will be honest on this blog because it keeps me accountable to everyone reading and to myself!!! On Friday night, my honey and I went out to The California Pizza Kitchen for dinner and boy what a temptation. Luckily, I had downloaded this app that is a restaurant guide and gives you the points as well. So I looked that afternoon so I was prepared for what I should order. I order a chicken Caesar salad - half size {12 points} and RJ had ordered my favorite pizza (BBQ Chicken and Bacon) so I swiped a piece of his pizza {4 points} and then I was REALLY BAD!! We walked around the mall for a little bit and then decided to get dessert. Cinnabon. WARNING!!!!!!!! RJ bought one of those 6 packs because it was cheaper and we went back to my house to watch a movie and we had our dessert. I had half of a cinnabon {12 points} Holy Moley that’s a lot of points for a sweet treat. I had 47 points that day. I told you I was bad!

Saturday morning I woke up feeling soooo guilty because of all the points I had allowed myself to eat the night before but I couldn’t go back, I could only go forward. That day Renee (my sister) and I were going to her new house to rip out some hideous and huge bushed that were taking over the front of her house. So on the way we stopped and picked up salads and ate them when we got there. That afternoon I got one intense workout so for dinner I had quite a bit of food. My dad made a London broil in the crock pot, homemade mashed potatoes, and broccoli and cheese. It was fantastic! After dinner, RJ and I sat down with my parents to watch the movie "The Hunger Games" (really good movie) and of course! I had half a cinnabon {12 points} because RJ left the box at my house, big mistake. I had 35 points that day (2 over).

Finished job

Sunday was easier. For lunch, my dad and I headed out to Taco Bell and I had 2 steak Tacos {8 points} and they were really yummy and filling. For dinner we went out with my mom to Cracker Barrel (my goodness we ate out a lot last week!!) I had a really hard time with what to eat but I had eaten so little that day that I splurged just a little. I had a house salad, chicken and dumplings, pinto beans and half a biscuit. It was quite yummy and worth the points. I actually don’t have them on my computer yet, I wrote them out on my tablet and calculated my points but never put it in my computer. Oops!

That brings us to today. Are you tired of reading about my food yet?? Because I sure am tired of talking about it!! :-)

Thanks for following me in this journey. All the encouraging words mean so much to me and really have helped me along the way. I'm not saying that there won’t be times where I will want to give up but I won’t let myself because now I have let my entire facebook world know that I am overweight and a diet jumper. But that’s okay; because that means that I am going to see this thing to the end. I am going to reach my short term and long term goals because all of you are following this and know my good and bad days.



One day at a time...

Starting Weight: 201 pounds

Short Term Goal: 186 pounds (5% of my weight)

Long Term Goal: 150 pounds

Pounds Lost: 3!! WoHoo!

Tuesday, 8/14

Day 2 of Weight Watchers

Last night when I went to bed, I was starving and somewhat miserable so I decided I needed to change up my day and make it different. This morning when I got up I actually made myself breakfast. I don’t normally eat breakfast because I don’t make the time but by the time lunch rolls around, I am beyond hungry!! Anyway, so I made a whole grain English muffin with a tablespoon of peanut butter and a banana. I was hungry at lunch but I was able to eat a smaller portion of lunch and feel full. At lunch, I had leftovers from dinner the night before so I had a hot dog and a half as well as a 1/4 cup of baked beans. Yummy!! Around 2 I was ready for a little snack so I had a serving of Special Crackers with a Laughing Cow spreadable cheese. Also, Logan and I made a trip to Wal-Mart and I picked up some slim fast protein powder so I could add it to my milk. I cannot have the pre-made meal substitutes because I am lactose intolerant but when I counted all the points together, they were dead even (wohoo!) So around 4, I had a Slim Fast Shake. For dinner, Jenny made a lemon and herb chicken helper meal. It was delish and I was able to have a cup of it and it was only 3 points. At like 8:30, I was watching TV with Jenny and I got "the munchies" so I had an apple with some peanut butter.

So I know that sounds like a TON of food but actually, I only went over my point allowance by like 4 and I have 49 weekly points so now I am down to 45 weekly points but I won’t call this day a failure because I have not had a soda in 2 days and I have not had any fast food in 2 days. Fir me, this is quite an accomplishment.

Tomorrow is Wednesday so I always will be faced with fast food but if I watch my points and make smart choices, I will still be successful!!

One day at a time!!!

Weight Watchers

My sister Jen joined Weight Watchers in January and since then she has lost 30+ points and I have been so proud of her and she looks great. I have decided to join her in doing Weight watchers (it’s easy because I live with her for part of the week so we can help each other).

So this morning, I woke up and had a determination to jump on a scale and get myself back into gear. Only 1 problem, jenny doesn’t have a scale. So with a grumbling, I sat down at my computer to check my e-mails and I had one from Weight Watchers telling me about a promotion that they have going on and I was hooked. The wheels in my head started turning and I thought, "If Jenny can be so successful at this, why can’t I?!" So, I just signed up for 3 months of Weight Watchers Online and we'll how it goes. Fingers crossed, points calculated, and food weighed. I CAN DO THIS!

I have plugged in all of my numbers and set my short term goal and I am reaching for it! I am allowed to have 33 points a day and 49 points a week. My first goal is to lose 5% of my target weight so that goal is 186lbs. I figured if I just spent a ton of money to get started I need to begin right away and make this happen! For lunch, Logan wanted Chicken Nuggets and Crispy Crowns. So took out my little calculator on my phone and started calculating points. I had 5 chicken nuggets, 11 crispy crowns, half a cup of sweet peas and a tablespoon of ketchup. I used 12 points and I can still have 21 today! Wohoo!! First meal a success!! :-)

One day at a time...

Frustrated!!

Okay, I’m starting to get frustrated! Last week I worked really hard to keep my calories where they need to be. I started using an app called My Fitness Pal and I started logging everything I ate. Also, this past weekend I spent all day Saturday, Sunday, and Monday night helping my sister paint her new house. this is actually a pretty good workout and I burned a lot of calories so I thought for sure that when I got on the scale Monday morning that I was see I had lost my 2 pound goal... NOT! I stayed the same! 196.6!! You got to be kidding me!!! I worked my butt of this weekend and nothing.

Today I skipped the diet. It is my 6 year anniversary with my honey and I was not going to miss out on a good time by counting calories. But first thing tomorrow morning I will get back into counting calories and drinking my water.

Here we go again...

I know that they say it doesn’t matter when you try and watch what you eat (DIET) but for me, summer is almost impossible!! Life is beyond busy during the summer months and I just don’t have the time to commit. I know that I have just made a bunch of excuses but just a glimpse at the month of July... I have only been home for 9 days. The rest of the time I have been with family and traveling. Lots and lots of traveling.



Throughout it all, I have held steady on my weight and I am still at 196.6 but its okay because I got home last night from vacation and this morning hopped on the scale and no weight gain! Normally I would put on anywhere from 3-6 pounds on vacation so for me to be holding steady, I was pretty happy about that. I may not show much weight loss on the scale but I can see a difference in the clothes I wear. This is a picture that I took a couple weeks ago when I was in Tennessee for my cousins wedding and when I looked at the picture, I could see a DIFFERENCE!

July 2012

I have not given up, I am still determined; I still want to reach 165 by Thanksgiving. So I have 16 weeks to lose 31 pounds. That is about 2 pounds a week. Think I can do it?? I DO!!! 1 day at a time and 1 week at a time! Baby steps to a better me!!! I CAN DO THIS!

One day at a time...

Emotional eating

Are you an emotional eater? I am! When I am stressed, I eat. When I am happy, I eat. When I am sad, I eat. You get the picture. This week my family got some news regarding my mom’s health and this has sent me into a tailspin of unhealthy eating. When I get to the point of emotional eating, I don’t reach for the carrot sticks or the bottle of water. I reach for the cheese burger and the sodas. UGH! There went that month of no cheese burgers! I think one of the biggest blessings about this blog is that I am learning things about myself. I big deeper so I can understand why I do things so II can document it here. Now that I have realized that I am such an emotional eater, I hope to be more prepared for it in some way (one can hope anyway!!)

This week may not show very good results on the scale but I will pick myself back up and get back on track with my diet!!

One day at a time...

Failure?

What is failure?? Is it striving for something and not succeeding? Is it promising yourself you are going to get something done and you do not achieve it? Or is it simply letting yourself down? There have been a lot of ups and downs on this diet that I started a month ago but this week has been the worst. I woke up this morning feeling like a failure, feeling fat and feeling really down about myself and my lack of success in this journey. But then I had to take a step back and look at what I have achieved. I may not be working out every day; I may not eat salads every day for every meal. But I have been able to achieve some things in this past month. I lost 10 pounds, and I’ve kept them off! I have given up French fries (A HUGE THING for me) I have almost completely given up sodas (I can count on one hand the number of sodas I have had in the last month), I am more aware of what I am eating and drinking and I have found a determination in me that I never knew was possible! So does that make me a failure? Am I a failure because this past week I fell so far off the wagon with my diet that I cannot even consider myself on a diet?? I would like to think that answer to that question is no. I haven’t completely given up and thrown in the towel. I haven’t told myself to just forget trying. Every morning, I wake up, and think that today I am going to do something different with my diet. And as long as I continue to think that way, I will not allow myself to think that I have failed. I am still going to try and I am still going to strive to make the best food decisions that I possibly can.

A little background on what my life is like and why I find it hard to diet all week. And I am not saying all this to make excuses because there is no excuse to not eat healthy and make better health decisions for yourself.

I am a stay at home aunt (love it!!) but that also means I am too busy with the kids most of the time to think healthy. I think quick, easy, and convenient. I also stay with my sister a lot of the times. Spending the night with her on Sunday night and not going home until Wednesday and sometimes not going home until Friday. This is probably my biggest obstacle out there. We all know that healthy food is expensive. So when I am staying with family, dieting does not come first. I still strive to make good healthy choices but sometimes there just isn’t a healthy option for me. I also am on the go a lot. I am either going to a training for my jewelry business or going to a softball game or meeting my fiancé somewhere or just going! This is where the dag gone fast food comes in! I will admit it; I am a fast food junkie which is probably why my weight shot up at 203 pounds! But I don’t always like to get salads. If I am busy and in the rush to get somewhere, you can’t exactly cut up a piece of chicken and eat a salad. Let’s be real! The easy choice is a burger, chicken nuggets, or a sandwich. So I have really tried to stick to the chicken and I have not had a burger in a month (oh, that sounds good now)

So I say all of that to say, I’m not giving up! I may be struggling right now, but that doesn’t mean I am going to stop trying. In fact, I am going to try even harder to my make diet a priority in my life. I will never succeed in my weight loss until I make it my main focus. Thanks for keeping up with my in this journey and for asking me how it is going but most of all for your encouragement. It means a lot to know that I have so many people backing me up in this!

One day at a time...

Vacation

Have you ever tried to diet while on vacation? Or a better question is, have you ever tried to stick to your diet while on vacation?? Did it leave you frustrated and annoyed with yourself? Or did it leave you proud and a pound or two lighter?! Well for me, trying to stick to a diet while away at the beach has proved to be nearly impossible!! Every day it seems like I am failing at my diet. And while this is not going to cause me to quit trying, it has left me mad at myself for being weak and having no self control.

We arrive here Thursday night and Friday morning it seems like I started my diet downward spiral! I went out to breakfast on Friday to cracker barrel and I decided I didn’t want coffee that morning; I wanted sweet tea with lemon. I figured I was balancing what I would have used in sugar with my coffee with the sugar in the sweet tea. I then ordered a low carb breakfast with 3 eggs ever easy and a side of country ham. Well when my plate came to table, it had a nice size serving of hash brown casserole. I LOVE hash brown casserole. Something about potatoes, cheese and onions... yum! Well of course I didn’t order it because I knew it wasn’t good for me but when it came out on the plate, there was no way I had enough self control to not eat it!! So I finished off my breakfast and was quite satisfied and ready to hit the beach. A couple hours later, my parents get McDonalds and they brought me back my weakness, nuggets. I didn’t ask them to bring it to me, but they knew I liked them and were sweet enough to think to bring them to me. I ate every single one of them and absolutely enjoyed them! I did drink water the rest of the afternoon but once dinner came around... my diet was so far out the window that it was nearly to my sister-in-laws house in Colorado!!! We went to Nicholas’s pizza and if you have ever been to Rehoboth beach, you KNOW what Nicholas’s pizza is and what they are famous for... Nic-O-Boli's. Basically a pizza turn over but about 100xs better! I get mine with no beef, light cheese, extra sauce, sweet peppers and pepperoni. Holy cow, let me just tell you, these things are amazing and there was no way I could go to Nicholas’s and not get one. That just wouldn’t work for me! So I ate every last bite of my Nic-O-Boli and I washed it down with a cherry coke. Shoot, I messed that diet day up really bad!!!

Saturday... another bad day. I got up, had a peanut butter granola bar and a glass of water. But for lunch, we had cappriotti's. I had a small turkey sub with light mayo, lettuce, extra pickles, salt, pepper and oregano. it was awesome and because I had only had a granola bar for breakfast, I was so hungry that I devoured the entire sub instead of saving half for later... oops... for dinner we had a cookout (my 2 aunts and their husbands also have a place in the trailer park that my grandmothers/our place is) with the whole family that is down here this weekend and had some of the best steaks ever! T-bones with monerary seasoning. Yum! So I had a nice big slab of T-bone steak and some potatoes.

Then there was today. And my oh my, I ate terrible all day long! I am pretty mad at myself as I sit here and rethink of all the nasty stuff that I put into my body today. No wonder my stomach is queasy!! Let’s start from the beginning, woke up around 8, had a granola bar to offset the hunger headache that I woke up with, then we went to surf bagel in Lewes. If you have never eaten then, I HIGHLY recommend it. But be aware that they are a busy busy bagel shop but very worth the wait. I normally get ham and cheese on a plain bagel but this morning I got the ham and cheese on a whole wheat bagel. Not much of a switch but I was trying! Yum yum yum. Those bagels are the high light of my day whenever we get them. :-) We skipped lunch and traded that for ice cream. Oops! It was beyond hot on the beach today and by the time we got off the beach, we all wanted sundaes. I got a small vanilla cone with rainbow sprinkles (the inner child came out in me ha-ha) and I enjoyed every single bite. I always seem to find that when I eat badly, I don’t think too much about it when I am actually eating but about 10-15 minutes later, I feel so guilty and mad at myself. If only I could remind myself of that guilt every time I get ready to place an order! Ugh! For dinner we had left over’s. I had a hot dog -no bun. Some grilled chicken and about 5 bites of potatoes. Dinner wouldn’t have been such a bad way to end my night but then we started a camp fire... then the marshmallows came out... and then the chocolate and graham crackers... S'MORES! I had 2!!! I couldn’t just stop at 1?!?! No! I had to eat 2!!! What. Is. Wrong. With. Me!??!?!?

Ya know, it’s one thing to diet at home, but when you go away to the beach for the weekend, it is so incredibly easy to slip on your diet. I have had so many failures this weekend but I’m not giving up! And when I get up in the morning, it is a brand new day! A brand new day where I can make smart food choices and better decisions. Yes, I am going to have a few days of bad (really really really bad) eating, but I am not giving up! I am keeping myself accountable on this blog and I am sharing my journey with all of you so that maybe you can be encouraged or encourage me! The main thing is, don’t give up. Don’t mess up and decide it’s not worth the fight. Don’t have a bad couple of days and decide you can’t do it. You can lose the weight if you want to!!! I have started so many diets because of a comment from family, or my doctor tells me I need to lose weight, but this time, I’m doing this for me! I am doing this hard, frustrating, annoying, and rewarding journey because I decided I wanted to change! I wanted to make something different of my life. I decided I wanted to get skinny so I can be healthy but I want to be the fun aunt. I want to be the aunt that is right in the middle of the kids running and playing. Not the aunt who is sitting on the sidelines!!! (Okay, I am done myself motivational speech now!)

I'll update once I am home and have an updated weigh in. I hope I haven’t gained all my weight back!!

One day at a time...

Thursday, 5/24

I don't normally post personal things on this blog because this isn’t a normal life blog. This is my blog to record my weight loss journey but today I cannot resist doing a little personal blog before I go into my weight loss journey for the past few days.

10 years ago today, heaven gained a very special angel and we said goodbye to one of my favorite people in the world. I remember the day like it was yesterday. I was packing to go to the beach with my meme (much like I am doing tonight) and the phone rang. Meme was calling me to tell me that my Aunt was being taken to the hospital with chest pains and she was heading to the hospital to be with her. being the selfish 13 year old that I was, I was highly upset because I was just so sure that my beach trip was going to get cancelled so I was really annoyed and never thought the night would end the way it did. The house phone rang around 11 o'clock and I was sure meme was calling to say she was cancelling the trip. My mom answered and I knew... I ran downstairs to my sister’s room and yelled "I think Aunt Connie passed away" we went upstairs and about that time my mom was hanging up the phone and tears were streaming down her face. And we knew... Aunt Connie was amazing! She had this really sick sense of humor and always was the highlight of any family party. She always had the crowd around her and I wanted to be just like her when I grew up. I miss her still. I never look at a horse without thinking about her because the thing she loved the most (after her family) was her horse Ginger. I have no doubt that if she was still around today she would be one of the biggest bloggers. She loved this kind of stuff! Love you Aunt Connie.

Sorry!! Now on to the main point of my blog!!

I feel like a complete failure when it comes to my diet and exercise this week. In fact, I only lost a pound but I guess I should be glad that I didn’t gain weight!! Just because I had a bad week, doesn’t mean that I’m giving up, I am still trying to make good food choices but I am not perfect by any means!!! I had my first soda in about 3 weeks today thanks to a wicked migraine and one of the only ways I know how to get rid of them is caffeine so that is what I did. I had a large glass of coke and I really didn’t enjoy as much as I used to. It wasn’t anything special. Wohoo!! I was nervous to drink it because I didn’t want to get that taste back. I didn’t want to crave sodas like I used to...

Anyway! Gotta go, we are getting ready to head to the beach in a few minutes. I’ll try and post a blog on my phone sometime this weekend! Happy Memorial Day and thank you to our Service men and women!

One day at a time...

Sunday, 5/20

Hi all, I don’t have much time to blog because I’m getting ready to head over to my future in-laws to help them pack their apartment up (they are moving to a new apartment next weekend) so I’ll be there most of today and this upcoming week. Not sure how much time I will have to blog but I will do my best to get some time in!!

This week went pretty well. I’m really glad to be able to have carbs again and I haven’t noticed much of an issue with me eating whole grains which is good!!! I have been very strict with myself but this weekend I have been pretty bad with iced coffee - my major weakness!!! I had a McDonalds caramel frappe and this morning, I have a mocha coconut frappuccino and oh man! It was AH-MAZ-ING!! I know that they are loaded with sugar and fat and all the unhealthy stuff but I just couldn’t help myself!! Yesterday my mom and I went out for a girls shopping trip and about half way through we wanted a "treat and dinner" so we got Frappes and chicken nuggets (whoops!)

I waited all winter for one of these!!!

Okay so this week I didn’t work out at all (because I was lazy) but this week I am going to try my hardest to work out every night. My parents and I are leaving on Thursday evening for our trailer at the beach and we will be down there until Monday and I have a feeling my diet is going to be blown!!! We made simple one-dish meals for dinner and I know that none of those meals are going to be SBD approved...

One fun thing is this weekend when my mom and I went out, we went shopping and I actually had to get a smaller size shorts because my regular size were starting to get too loose. :-)

Anyway, I know that this was a short blog but like I said, I’m getting ready to run out the door!!!

One day at a time...

Tuesday, 5/15

Okay so today is one of those frustrating days!!! This morning when I woke up, I decided that I wanted to start Phase 2 of the SBD because Phase 1 and I just were not getting along! Well in this Phase, I am doing it until I get down to my goal weight. So basically I’ll be on this for the rest of my life. Ha-Ha okay not really but it kinda feels that way. On this phase, I am able to start reintroducing carbs and fruits (wohoo!!)

I didn’t have anything to eat until about 12:30 today and when I did eat, I had a bowl of LIFE cereal with my fat free milk so that was a nice little treat seeing how I hadn’t had and cereal in about 2 weeks. Then there really wasn’t anything else in the house so I munched on so dry roasted peanuts and had a bottle of water. Tonight, I made a FANTASTIC dinner! Grilled chicken with bbq sauce, peas with some melted "I can't believe it’s not butter", French green beams with fat back, Mac-n-cheese and brown rice. Okay so I had a tiny spoonful of green beans but I didn’t touch the Mac-n-cheese. The brown rice and the peas I was allowed to have half a cup (which I did) and my plate was surprisingly very full! I finished dinner and felt full and satisfied. **Happy Dance**

Tonight I had planned on finally working out considering it has been almost a week but my body had other plans. I have bad feet. Like really bad feet--- 2 surgeries each foot and they still are not fixed! Well, after cleaning the kitchen, making dinner and then re-cleaning the kitchen, my feet are really really bothering me. Plus with the rain that is coming in tonight, that makes them extra achy so unfortunately there is no way that I could handle working out. As I am sitting here typing this, my dad is out in the living room doing his workout and I am feeling sorry for myself. I am also feeling guilty for not working out. But I have to remind myself that I cannot control my pain and I cannot control that after 4 total surgeries that my feet are still not fixed! I cannot let this discourage me! Tomorrow is a new day and a fresh start. I am still determined to lose this weight. I may not lose it as quickly as I want to and I may not be skinny by the end of the summer, but I will reach my goal one day! And when that happens, I will be doing the happy dance and shouting so loud that my sister-in-law in Colorado will hear me!! :-)

One day at a time...

The last few days...

Okay, so I haven’t blogged in a really long time and all weekend long I promised I was going to go back and blog about everything that I had done or hadn’t done. Well, here is it, Tuesday morning, and I haven’t blogged in nearly a week. And to be quite honest with you, I’m too lazy to try and remember what happened for the past week ha-ha Therefore, I am going to do a brief weekend update and then I’ll go from there!! And just a warning, I COMPLETELY blew it this weekend! UGH!

Friday night was a bad night on the SBD for me! We had my sister Renee' surprise 30th birthday party and let’s just say my diet was blown!!! I had a cheese burger with this whole wheat bread that was so thin you could barely call it bread so that wasn’t good. Then I had some of my aunt’s homemade mc-n-cheese. And then as if that wasn’t bad enough, I had a sliver of Renee's ice cream cake! Whoa! My worst night on the SBD to date!!!! Goodness!

Saturday morning and all day Saturday was just awful!!! I had all day training with Premier Designs in New Jersey so it was another early Saturday for me. I was up at 5:45 and by 6:15 I was nursing a java monster (really yummy) but it was so not SBD approved!! For breakfast we stopped at Wawa and I wasn’t even thinking about what I could eat, I just wanted something to fill me up because we wouldn’t be eating for several hours. So I got a ham, egg and cheese on a croissant and I had a cup of coffee. For lunch, we stopped at Chick-fil-a and I was good and got a Cesar salad but for dessert I got a milkshake! AH!! I am failing left and right over here! For dinner, RJ and I went out to cracker barrel. I was half good, and half bad. For my drink I had a sweet tea with lemon (I couldn’t resist!) and for my main dish I had grilled chicken tenders, green beans, steak fries, and for the life of me I cannot remember what I had for my third side dish. Needless to say, Saturday night I was pretty annoyed with myself about eating so badly all day!

Sunday was a new day and I wanted it to be different... it wasn’t! For breakfast, I had one of those chocolate junior cupcakes from Tasty Cake and it was amazing but I knew it wasn’t SBD approved. I was hungry, in a rush to get to church on time and it was sitting in the kitchen... For lunch we went out to chilis to celebrate mother’s day and once again, I didn’t make the best food choices. I had the Monterrey chicken (grilled chicken, bbq sauce, bacon, Monterrey cheese) and steamed broccoli. The Monterrey chicken is probably one of my most favorite menu items so I didn’t resist the temptation. :-( For dinner, I had some of my mom's homemade chili and instead of adding rice like I normally would; I added my low-fat cheese and some fat free sour cream.

Yesterday was a busy day with Logan and that means I didn’t make the best choices. I did not eat breakfast (too busy) but for lunch, Logan wanted a hot pocket. So went I found them, they was croissant pockets. I pulled 2 out of the freezer, made Logan his and then popped the second in and made myself one. I figured they were croissants they couldn’t be that bad! WRONG!!!! They are 320 Calories, 17g of Fat, 20 mg Cholesterol, and 34 Carbs! Ouch! For dinner, I was once again running late for a Premier meeting so I just grabbed McDonalds on the way and I can't exactly eat a salad while driving so I got a grilled snack wrap with grilled chicken, lettuce and cheese. Then I also got a 10 piece chicken nugget because I have no self control!!

Okay, so that is my last few days in a nutshell. I blew it, every single day! But I am not going to give up! I am going to keep going and pushing and I will see results!!! Even with eating so bad all weekend, I didn’t gain any weight from my last weigh in. I am at 196 and I will continue to lose it! Determination had not faltered!

 One Day at a Time...

Holy Cow!!

Okay! So I promise to do an update really soon about my weekend, but this morning, while getting ready for church, I decided to try on a skirt that as of the beginning of last summer did not fit. Was not even close to zippering up and you could forget trying to sit in it! So this morning, I pulled it on, started to pull on the zipper, and IT ZIPPED!!! Not only that, but I am currently sitting on my bed, typing this! Needless to say, I did the happy dance in my bedroom this morning!! Wohoo!!

One day at a time...

Wednesday 5/9

Okay so today was a great day. I slightly cheated on my diet but I don’t really feel too badly about it. I'll explain in a second.

So this morning when I got up, I made myself a boiled piece of ham for breakfast and I had a bottle of water. I had some work to do on my computer so I didn’t really think about a morning snack until around 11 so the I just had a couple handfuls of dry roasted peanuts to help hold me over until I could find time to eat lunch. I knew that today I wanted to do my work out a little but different because it was Wednesday and we had church so I knew it would be easier if I just did my workout on my own today and then I could just come straight to Jens after church was over. So after Logan had eaten his lunch, I heated up a leftover pork chop and some lima beans. Yummy!! Then it was time to put Logan down for his nap. I laid down with him for about 45 minutes then I got up and did a couple things around the house until about an hour and a half had passed. I had to wait the long because at the beginning of my workout, it warns you not to work out until at least an hour has passed since your last meal. Today I had to do Plyometrics. Yuck! But I put the DVD in and I made myself get started. Just like last week, I was only able to do half of the workout but I know I worked harder then I did last week. This week I was able to do more of the moves in the workout, I was able to jump a little higher and I was able to lunge a little lower lol

After I finished working out, it was time to get ready for church. After my shower, my mom text'd me and said she wished she had made my dad cupcakes for his birthday (which is today, HAPPY BIRTHDAY WORKOUT BUDDY!!!) but she was then lying down with Logan and couldn’t get up or he would wake up. I decided that I would then make his cupcakes but I would have to hurry to get them done before church was over. Well, our cupcake mix was expired so I decided to make my dad’s favorite cookies, chocolate chip with walnuts. Well ask just about any girl and they will say they love cookie dough. I am one of those girls!!! I actually did pretty well. Normally I would have eaten several spoonfuls along the way but I only took one finger swipe of dough and it really was yummy!! Once the cookies were out of the oven, I swiped one but then quickly left them to cool while I got ready for church. For me, only eating one cookie is a great accomplishment. Some may see that as a failure to not eating something that is SBD approved, but I am making a lifestyle change. I am not just dieting until I lose my weight. I am training my body to eat healthier and to make better food choices along the way. For dinner, we did our usual fast food stop and today we did Chick-fil-a. Did you guys know that they now serve grilled chicken tenders for kids?? I didn’t! I ordered a kids meal for myself tonight. lol I had 6 grilled chicken nuggets and a fruit cup. This is where I slightly cheated on my diet. The fruit is not allowed on Phase 1 of the SBD because of all the natural sugar but 6 little chicken nuggets were not going to fill me up so I figured eating a fruit cup was better than eating fries.

Anyway! After church, RJ and I always get the kids and take them over to the school building where Jen and Renee are doing AWANA. Well, our normal routine is that we run across the parking lot. Well, not really run but jog. Well because I had already completed my Plyometrics for the day, I could only run about half way before my legs started cramping up. I guess I got a really good workout in :-)

When I got to Jenny's house, that little kids meal of the dinner was no longer with me so I heated up a cheeseburger (previously grilled this week) minus the bun, put some mustard on it and had a few dill pickles. Yummy!!

Okay so real quick, has anyone ever drunk the Sparkling ICE drink?? My sister Jen started drinking this last month and oh my goodness! I love these! And there is like nothing to them. So I usually drink like one a day just to switch up the constant water.

Well, I think I have blogged enough for today so I think I am going to go grab a sugar free popsicle and snuggle up in bed to watch my favorite Wednesday night show, Revenge.

One day at a time...

Day ?? :-)

So yesterday was NOT good day for me! I ate what I was supposed to but last night, we were out at my sister's new house (well, possible new house. They are working on settlement now) and we didn’t get out of there until 7:30. I was starting with my sister Jen that night so for dinner, they chose McDonalds. ::sigh:: I really need to avoid that place! I have no, and I repeat NO self-control when we go there! Once again, I get the chicken nuggets. And once again, I feel guilty after I eat. When will I learn?! Needless to say, I was very disappointed with myself and because I stayed with Jenny, I could work out with my dad so Jenny and I did a little dancing. That didn’t do very much for me.

Side note: I am beginning to notice a pattern with myself... I make a lot of excuses for myself when I make a bad decision or when I don’t do my work out. I'm tired of that!! I also notice that I reason with myself. Like, oh, I ate well all day; one bad meal isn’t going to kill me. Or, oh, it’s late, I’m tired. I’ll just work out tomorrow. What is that?! Annoying!!!

;

Anyway!! Today was good day FINALLY! I actually didn’t eat until 6:00 today because I was too busy with Logan and then my stomach was hurting to bad for me to cook myself anything. I came home around lunch time, with him because I just wasn’t feeling good and I needed my mom to watch him. I made him lunch and munched on some dry roasted peanuts (SBD approved ha-ha) and a bottle of water. After lunch, I went and laid down for a few hours and when I finally woke up; I was starving and was ready to eat!! I quickly grabbed a cheese stick and then had to jump in the shower and get ready for a Premier Designs Jeweler training. By the time I was ready, my dad had dinner ready (a perk to being at home) so I quickly ate a BBQ Pork chop and a little bit of Mac-n-cheese (opps, that isn’t SBD approved) Then it was off to training. When I finally got home (around 9 pm) my dad met me at the door with his workout clothes and sneakers on. The workout DVD was already set up on the TV... think he was ready to start!? After a few minutes, he and I are in the living room getting an incredible workout!

As I’m sitting here, I am munching on some dry roasted peanuts and my arms are feeling like rubber! Like a said, it was an incredible workout!! Hopefully I’m not too sore tomorrow because I have a lot of things that I need to get done!

One day at a time...

My first weekend

Okay so I promised myself that I was going to be honest on this blog so that includes when I fail and slip on my diet so that I what I am going to do. I am going to be honest and hope that I don’t get any negative comments ha-ha

Saturday morning started bright and early and by 7:00am I was sitting on a softball field waiting for the day to start. I ended up taking my dad’s car to Wawa to get myself a healthy breakfast and it didn’t go well... I got myself scrambled eggs, a chicken Cesar salad and *gasp* a sweet tea. I couldn’t help myself!! I was exhausted, desperate for some sugar and I didn’t want a cup of coffee. So that was my first downfall of the weekend of downfalls!! I was about halfway back to the fields when I realized I had forgotten to grab a fork... it would have been interesting to eat scrambled eggs without a fork so I grabbed my dad’s church keys and rummaged through the schools kitchen to find a fork and then I doctored up my eggs a bit with salt and pepper. They didn’t taste too bad but I’m just NOT a fan of eggs so I only ate half of them. I did get a lot of walking in on Saturday. I should have set my phone up to track all my walking! By the end of the day, my calves were on fire and ready to split in half!! Anyway!!! So around 11am I was hungry and decided to eat my salad. Well if you have ever gotten salads from Wawa before, you know that they don’t put salad dressing in the salads. Well, I had never gotten a salad there before and hadn’t even thought to look for dressing... so I ate it dry. Oh yeah! And they don’t give you a fork. Luckily I did still have my fork from breakfast.

Well the next time I ate was at dinner. It was my future sister-in-laws (Stephanie’s) birthday so we all went out to JB Dawson’s for dinner. By this time it was several hours since I had eaten that half dry salad that I ate 6 hours ago is long gone! well when you eat there, they have the most delicious bread that is on the table so when RJ and I get there and after we order out, he cuts himself off a piece and starts slathering on the butter... my mouth starts watering! I chug down half of my water, hoping to offset the craving and praying that my salad that I ordered quickly makes it appearance! Well it was just too much temptation for me so I stole a bite of his bread... YUM! But I was instantly mad at myself! Why did I give into that temptation?? I am stronger then this! Finally, my salad shows up - wasn’t the best I have had but it would give my stomach something to digest so I didn’t embarrass myself by finishing off half a loaf of bread with butter! My dinner finally arrives, broccoli and a grilled chicken breast with bbq sauce. It looks wonderful! I look over and RJ had ordered chicken fingers and fries - my comfort food! I ate my dinner very slowly and drank another glass of water hoping that would fill me up. after dinner I knew the family was going to order dessert and I didn’t just want to jump up and leave but I also didn’t want to tempt myself again. We stayed long enough for their dessert to arrive, for us to sing happy birthday to Steph, say goodbye to his family and FINALLY I was safe! I had made it through my first restaurant on the SBD.

It was Saturday night and RJ really wanted to see The Avengers in 3D so we got tickets for 9:30pm and headed back to my house for a bathroom pit stop and for me to change into jeans and flip flops. While we were there, we started talking to my parents and I was saying how I didn’t know how to go to the movies without getting pop corn and pretzel bites with cheese. My parents (oh so encouragingly) told me that eating bad once in a while wouldn’t hurt me so of course, I took their advice and got my popcorn and pretzel bites. NOT A GOOD IDEA!!!! I ate every single pretzel bite and by the time I was finished them, I thought I was going to throw my guts up! I hadn’t eating like that in almost a week and my stomach was just not accepting it! But I felt bad that RJ had paid for popcorn and I wasn’t going to eat it so I took a couple handfuls of that and yuck! It wasn’t good! The entire movie, I sat there angry at myself!!! I gave into a stupid temptation, messed up my entire week of hard work for one night of food. Dumb move!

Sunday morning came and after my girl from the night before, I chugged a bottle of water faster than anything and praying it would help washed my system out of that stupid food (I know it doesn’t work that way but I was wishful) My dad and I have a Sunday tradition where we always stop for starbucks on the way to church and I had already set in my mind when I started my journey to a new me that I wasn’t giving up my Sunday morning coffee. That just wasn’t happening. So I got my vanilla latte and enjoyed every sip. I didn’t feel guilty about that because I already knew every Sunday I was drinking that coffee!! For lunch I made myself a ham and chicken Cesar salad and then a munched on some sunflower seeds (yum) and I drake a bottle of water. My biggest disappointment was dinner that night! I am embarrassed just thinking about writing this. We went to McDonalds and I lost my control. I was downright sick of eating salads so I got chicken nuggets! I know how unhealthy they are, I know they are not SBD approved and I know I royally messed up but I ate them anyway. I felt guilty the entire time but my dad had paid for my dinner and I didn’t want to waste the money and I knew I couldn’t go back and change it. I had already messed up. Doesn’t mean I wasn’t still mad at myself but I learned something this weekend.

I can have all of the determination in the world to lose this weight, but I am still human and I will fail! I failed this weekend but I am not giving up! Other times that I have tried to diet and I would mess up like this, I would quit and say why bother. But I’m not going to do that this time! I am going to pick myself up and I’m going to do better this week! I am not going to even let my mind entertain the idea of eating badly but if I do, I am not going to beat myself up about it. I will pick myself up and move forward. Life isn’t about making mistakes and quitting, it’s about making miistakes and moving forward and learning from them! I have learned to never go to the movies without a healthy snack hidden in my purse. I have learned I need to change up my diet so I am not bored with my meals. I have learned that this diet is not going to be perfect. I am glad that I messed up this weekend because it taught me so much. Do I want a repeat>? ABSOLUTELY NOT!! I will lose this weight! And I will see this through the end, until i reach my goal weight!!

My last thought, I weighed in this morning and even though it wasn’t on the same scale I normally lose, I was weighing in at 198 this morning. That is 3 pounds that I lost with my diet and sporadic work out. Speaking of workouts, my life is entirely too busy to do P90x every day so I do it on the nights that I can and when I can’t, I at least do my crunches.

One day at a time...

Day 6

Finally! I’m writing a post for the actual day! I’m not backtracking trying to remember what happened a day before! It's a long one, sorry!

Today was actually the first day that my diet was actually tested and it started first thing this morning!! Well, let me backtrack a little bit. This morning, my mom let me sleep in (which was heavenly!!) but when I got up, my sister had brought over a bunch of egg mcmuffin sandwiches. And if you know me, you know they are my absolute favorite breakfast sandwich from there. I usually get it without the egg (I’m not a big egg person) and I just get the Canadian bacon, cheese and mcmuffin. Well I was good and after I heated up the whole sandwich to make it hot, I threw away the bread and ate the egg, Canadian bacon and a little bit of cheese. Yay me!! For lunch a made a Chicken Cesar Salad and ate that while I was talking to my mom at the table. Well, my mom was eating a bowl of cinnamon life cereal and the smell of sugar was sooooo enticing! I was so tempted to just eat a small handful of the cereal dry!! Temptation!! Instead, I quickly stood up, grabbed myself a sugar free fudgsicle and ate it before I could give into my temptation. I didn’t really get a chance to eat the whole thing because my sweet niece realized I had chocolate and quickly made her way over to me to share. She wasn’t very happy when she realized it was all gone and I wasn’t going to pull out a second one!!

Notice the chocolate around her mouth?!

Well it was an absolutely beautiful day here so I went outside to soak up some sun for a couple of hours and when I came in, I was dying of thirst and I was also starving. So I had my first taste of diet Mnt dew and I LOVED it. I also pulled out some low sodium roast beef deli slices and rolled about 5 slices up and had myself a little afternoon snack. Tonight is when the real temptation came into play! Today is my brother-in-laws birthday so my sister Jen had a little family get together to celebrate. She ordered pats pizza, had about 20 sodas and a ton of fruit!!! So before I went to her house, I stopped at burger king and picked up another amazing Chicken Cesar Salad and ate that at her house while everyone else was chowing down on pizza! That pizza smelled absolutely to die for but I resisted my temptation and just ate my salad!! Once I was done that I noticed a vegetable try and I was so excited because I can have vegetables but I can’t have fruit. She has carrots (which I love) celery, broccoli, and tomatoes. Well on the SBD, Phase 1, I can’t have carrots, I don’t like raw broccoli, and I don’t like tomatoes. So I grabbed a few pieces of celery, pulled out her peanut butter, and quickly made my way out of the kitchen! But then the time for cake and ice cream came. And oh man, that cake looked yummy! So after we sang happy birthday, I politely made my way out of the room and avoided the cake table like a plague! I knew if I saw a plate with a piece of cake sitting on it, I would have quickly grabbed it, and shoved it in my mouth faster than my nephew does! Not a pretty picture, I know!! After the cake was put away, I went into the kitchen to help clean up and they were putting the extra pizza away. Once again, my mouth started watering and my stomach started growling. Why is it, that when you cannot eat something, you want it that much more?! Not cool!! I have to admit, I did snitch a couple bites of strawberry but they were really really tiny bites!! On my way home, I stopped at McDonalds. Grabbed a plain grilled chicken sandwich and when I got home, I tossed the bread. 

As I sit here, I am feeling really proud of myself for overcoming my food temptations. Any other time that I have started diets in the past, at the first sign of temptation; I cave in and eat what I want. Not this time though! I have this determination like never before to lose this weight!! Tonight at the party, I was talking to my sister and one of her friends and it came up in conversation that I had started the SBD and her friend very excited told me that she had been on that before she had her children. She said she was a size 16 when she started the diet and before she had her first child, she was a size 4-6!! I was so excited that we had met up and she gave me some great tips to get through these first 2 weeks on the SBD!! It’s one thing to read testimonials online, but it’s another thing to actually meet someone who had been on the diet and who has had a great success in it!!! I can’t wait until the day that I can tell someone that when I started the SBD, I was a size 16-18 and I went down to a size 6-8 (my goal)

Off to bed. I have softball tournament with my dad tomorrow and it is my future-sister-in-laws birthday so we are going out to dinner to celebrate! Let’s hope I can overcome food temptations tomorrow as I know I am going to be faced with lots of them!!

One day at a time...

Day 5

Thursday was not a good day for me!!! It was a day that made me doubt myself and my ability to work out the way I need to.

Diet wise, I did great!!! I had a ham and cheese omelet for breakfast, a cheese stick for my morning snack and for lunch I had a lettuce wrap with ham and dill pickles. I also had 2 hard boiled eggs (I only ate the white), Lima beans and a bottle of water. I was really proud of my lunch because I actually made it the night before because I had to watch Logan at Jenny's house that day. Normally I would have made Logan’s lunch and ate whatever he was, normally that’s a cheese burger or chicken nuggets --- not SBD approved!!! For my afternoon snack, I had about 30 pistachio nuts and a bottle of water. Dinner time rolled around and I was on the go. My Dad's church softball season had its first game and I try to not miss any games so of course I was going. But what was I going to do for lunch??? I stopped at burger king and had the most amazing char grilled chicken Cesar Salad and a bottle of water. Yummy!!!! On my way home, I munched on some sunflower seeds, had my windows down, blaring the country music! Love it!!

When I got home, it was pretty late but one of my usual TV shows was on so my Dad and I waited until that was over to start our work out. By this time, its 10:15pm and both of us were tired but we didn’t want to skip our workout so we popped in the Yoga DVD and started the workout... it went downhill from there. I learned in the first 5 minutes that 1) I am NOT flexible 2) my wrists do not support my weight and 3) I am way to FAT to do Yoga. Talk about a pity party! Man I sat on the couch, watched the video and after about 10 minutes of watching it with my jaw dropping in awe of these people flexibility, I ran to the bathroom and did what any grown woman would do... I cried! I heard my dad turn off the DVD about 5 minutes later, which upset me all over again because I knew he has quit because I had... GUILT! I leave the bathroom, walk into my bedroom, plop down in the middle of my bad and start throwing one major pity party for myself! I was so disappointed in myself! Disappointed that I hadn’t tried harder in Yoga. Disappointed that I had let me dad down. Disappointed that I had allowed myself to get so fat over the past few years. Like I said, major pity party!! My dad then knocks on my door and suggests that we just do the stretching DVD so at least we do something. By this time, it’s close to 10:45 and we are both tired but I knew if I skipped another night, I wouldn’t keep going. I would just give up! So we start the stretching DVD with my sniffling and trying to get myself together and the first stretch is... yup, you guessed it, a Yoga pose! You have got to be kidding me!!! But I pushed trough and it ended up being a great stretching session. At one point, we were doing one of these really strange poses where you are laying on your back and you kick your legs all the way up to the point where you are just on your head and shoulders and your back is being supported by your hands. Well, my dad was able to do it, but I sure wasn’t!! So I am trying and trying to get enough momentum to get my legs up that high when I get a major case of the giggles! My dad looks over, seeing me attempting to get my legs up, he gets laughing and we end up just sitting on the floor killing ourselves laughing during that stretch!!!

Crazy right?!

Once I we finished the stretching DVD, I felt better. I was glad that I didn’t just give up and not try to at least do something!!! Even if it wasn’t what I was supposed to do. I ended my night, sitting in bed, eating some celery with peanut butter and started this blog. 

I'm so thankful to be doing this journey with my dad, he keeps me going, he encourages me, and he pushes me when he knows I can do better!! If I had to do this thing alone, I probably would have given up by now. I'm also thankful for encouraging friends who always have a kind word to say when I am discouraged!

One day at a time...